It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
