he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
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