You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
