just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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