All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
PANTIES FOUND
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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