My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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