My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize