Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize