She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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