So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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