god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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