I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize