once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
