theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
