How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
