he wants to bone in the snuggie
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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