the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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