Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Randomize
