i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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