Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
