Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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