I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Randomize
