I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
