Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
