you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
