"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
