yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
