Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
These tits shall not be calmed
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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