i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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