i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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