If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
