mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
