Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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