after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Randomize
