is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
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