Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
