Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
