apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize