she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
