Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
So much Jack, so little girl.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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