I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
