i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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