Swine flu. Run for my life!
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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