Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
