do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
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