the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I wish you could order shots online.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The feeling are messing with the penis
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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