I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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