I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
