i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
