I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
